I have officially entered my Oscar the Grouch period of quarantine. When I was on Twitter earlier, I saw this tweet, and literally never felt more heard or understood.
Those of us with complex disabilities (like Spinal Muscular Atrophy) were one of the first groups to begin isolating in the early days of this pandemic. We knew COVID19 was no-joke and we knew the risks it posed to us (and society) were real. We were the “canaries in the coal mine” — and we’ve been chirping loudly for months & months warning everyone about what was to come. Unfortunately, like real canaries in the coal mine, some of us dropped dead before the miners and the mining company noticed the poisonous gas that was about to ruin their lives, their business and their community. I wish I could say this analogy is hyperbolic but it isn’t because Rudy Giuliani already used up the quota of dramatic embellishment about 3 and a half weeks ago.
To be honest, I really thought that I’d get into this cranky stage of quarantine far sooner than I actually have. I made it ten months without having a meltdown… and that’s pretty good. After all, most people started freaking out by June. Although, if we include folks from the following three groups, we would need to push back that freak-out average to April 27th:
- people with CrossFit memberships
- people with acrylic manicures more than 1/4 inch in length
- people that consume more than 2.6 White Claws a week
So, frankly, I’m proud of myself for enduring this as long as I have. What has changed, might you ask? Well, frankly, in my daily routine, not that much has changed from the early days of quarantine. I’m still observing all the health protocols— and I’m being more diligent than ever. The only people allowed in my home are my select few caregivers— for I need to keep my “bubble” as small as possible since COVID19 is raging faster in my area than herpes at a frat party.
This sustained diligence is not easy (for anyone, of course). But, personally, it’s not been the hardest part. I expected to have to undertake these health protocols. And I knew this would all go on for a looooong time. I was prepared for that. And prepared for an extended period of time at home. But, what was I not prepared for?
Well, I wasn’t prepared for… ALL THE REST OF IT. All the ‘Holy shit, are you for REAL?’ moments of this year. And there were a LOT of those moments. For brevity, here is a short list of examples:
- The mental exhaustion of trying to ignore the many people with biology degrees from InfoWars that actually believed that a worldwide pandemic could magically disappear after Nov. 3rd.
- The pain of biting my tongue while Facebook aficionados shared “facts” on social media that masks didn’t work and could actually make you *get* COVID19.
- The willpower it took to not lash out at people that believe the weirdest shit I’ve ever heard. (i.e. That the COVID19 vaccine is a conspiracy led by Bill Gates to implant tracking devices inside our bodies so that the Illuminati can turn us into zombies.)
I really could go on… and on. So, that just goes to show that I was always destined to turn into Oscar the Grouch before the year was over— no matter how many Xanax I took.
So, where does that leave me now? I really don’t know. But, one thing I do know is that I will keep doing what I must do to stay safe and well. I can’t do any more than that. I can’t control the decisions of thousands (millions) of others that decide to ignore health protocols “just this one time.” Decisions that, when they ripple outward, endanger so many others. And, yes, even endanger my life. Because, the fact is: we canaries aren’t in the coal mine alone. You are with us, too.
Another thing I can do? Talk about my experience. Tell my story so that you know that there are countless people like me out in the world chirping loudly in the hopes you’ll hear us. And do the right thing.
There’s one final thing you should know: despite the fact that we have been sheltering the longest, those of us with complex disabilities & medical conditions are still not yet prioritized for the vaccine. So, we are counting on you to not be selfish assholes for just a little while longer. Not sure how to do that? Here are a few ideas:
- You can wear a mask.
- You can wash your hands.
- You can be kind.
- You can stop taking group photos with friends… or neighbors… or random people you met at Wendy’s… for social media to prove to the world that you aren’t letting 2020 ruin your life. (It’s embarrassing, and trust me, no one believes you, anyway.)
And last, but not least… For the love of sandwiches and all that is holy, DON’T gather for maskless meals with people outside your household!! I can’t emphasize this enough. Find another activity, or way to be together. Maskless gatherings (where food and drink are consumed) are one of the biggest engines of viral spread.
(No masks) + (close proximity) + (touching serving dishes/utensils/cups) + (consuming food) = COVID19 Dance Party!
So, with that, I’ll sign off for now… Be well. Be safe. Be smart.
And listen for those canaries…